TPA given to two people who needed it: good.
TPA given to one person who has a factitious/psychological disorder: well, no harm done.
Intubation of one patient: very, very good call.
Extubation of another patient: good. I'm glad her daughters got to be there.
Lotioning of a patient: Jeebus grits, why did this woman have to use Johnson's Baby Lotion? I hadn't smelled that smell in better than twenty years. It took me back to watching my grandmother get ready in the morning, in her alcove lined with mirrored closets, and her vanity mirror with Johnson's on the table.
I think I might have to go buy some Johnson's Baby Lotion just for the helluvit.
Self:
Oh, dear.
Noticeable right nasolabial flattening. Left neck musculature overcompensates for right on swallow. Left and right shoulder shrug equal. Right facial and neck dermatomes non-compensatory; total extinction of buccal and mandibular distributions. Compensation adequate.
Crooked smile: my new trademark.