What we talk about on slow days.

Is there an animal which, in its baby form, is not cute?

I assert that there is, though I don't know which one(s) that might be. The Mankiller swears that all baby animals are adorabubbles. We went on a Google search to see what might, in the baby-critter world, be uncute.

Llamas are cute as babies. So are goats. So are Tasmanian devils. Even Chinese Crested puppies are cute, which I was not expecting. Baby parrots are about the furthest thing from cute ever made, but even they, with their oversized beaks and button eyes, have a certain charm. Baby reptiles are cute because something scary in a large form is cute when it's wee.

We are still looking for the baby animal that won't make us squee and want to snuggle it.

The Mankiller and I also discussed the concept of Intrinsic Funniness, which I mentioned here a couple of days ago. Elephants, pennyfarthing bicycles, large moustaches, tweed blazers with leather elbow patches, and half-grown puppies are intrinsically funny. We agreed on those things. Possibly intrinsically funny things (those things which need more study) are mice, any consumable good that has a name like "Ho-Ho" or "Ding-Dong," certain shoes (white bucks and those loafers with tasseled tongues), balloons (opinion is divided between funny and scary), people in drum circles (funny or tiresome?), and bologna. Personally, I incline to the idea that bologna is funny. The Mankiller isn't so sure. She thinks bowling shoes are funny, but I find them overdone. I find pit bulls hilarious, especially when you rub their bellies and make them banjo, and she says they're too politicized.

We agree that although they are the butt of many jokes, the following things are not intrinsically funny: Jews/Poles/Irishmen/Your Best Friend (whatever ethnicity he is), the Wicked Witch of the West, the suburbs (more depressing than funny), anything Scots, garbage disposals, utility companies, and the Works Progress Administration. That last came out of a conversation with Richard the Respiratory Guy, who asked, "What can you never imagine anybody telling a joke about?" I came up with "the WPA;" The Mankiller came up with something I can't talk about on a family blog.

Suggestions? Disputations? We can't spend all day hacking our coworkers' Facebook pages; we need some help.